Potty training can feel like daunting for some parents. But it doesn’t have to be.

Just like so many things in life, learning to use the potty is exactly that, a learning experience. Deep down, most kids know how to do it. But they often need that little extra boost of confidence… and a whole lot of love.

And then there are those magical unicorn stories we hear.
One of my Early Childhood Development teachers once shared that her baby casually handed over their diaper one day and declared, “I am done.”
Potty training complete. Just like that. 

To this day, that story lives in my head as the pinnacle of potty training success. But perhaps behind that one perfect moment were probably countless tiny steps toward independence. steps only she and her now-grown children truly know.

For the rest of us? It’s a process.

When my own child turned three, I turned to the amazing team at the Santa Rosa Junior College Children’s Center where I work. They handed out this fantastic spring-break pamphlet full of research-backed tips. I followed it up to a T and had great success with it. Within one week time, my little one knew that he had to go to the toilet. He specifically enjoyed putting a sticker on his chart every time he went. (small sticker for pee, big sticker for #2) Did he still have accidents after that week, of course! But we also knew that it would be a process. 

In a nutshell here are the advices I have received from this experience:

 Accidents Are Totally Normal

Accidents aren’t failures. They’re part of the learning. Your child is figuring out what it feels like to be wet or soiled. Instead of focusing on the mess, help them take ownership by changing into clean clothes themselves. It builds independence (and patience… for both of you!).

Set Them Up for Success, get them involved and reward them

• Dress them in clothes they can pull down quickly think sweatpants or just underwear and a t-shirt.
• If the weather is nice, and you have a backyard let them play outside naked.
• Have a little potty available that you can move around to wherever they are.
• Encourage regular potty breaks every hour, but don’t force it. When it’s time to go you can say something like “I know it’s hard to stop playing, but it’s important to try to get to the bathroom on time.” Because yes, it is hard for their little brain to stop whatever they are doing to go potty and “switch gears”.
• If an accident happens, let them be part of the clean-up process: have them change themselves into clean clothes and have them help wipe up the accident so they see that cleaning takes time and effort.
• Use a rewards system over constant praise, as we don’t want to create reward junkies. I have used a sticker chart, but there are other rewards that may work for your child (maybe they like reading stories? play with dough? Anything that they can look forward to after going to the bathroom and enjoy).